Almost Father

*Part II of the 'Almost Trilogy'. Please see the other 2 parts of the series*


She tells you after its already been done 
How she've committed an unforgivable wrong; 
And you see it in her eyes that she ain't lying 
But all you can feel is the pain of your unborn child dying. 
Her voice barely a whisper, choked with shame 
And you see yourself choosing his or her's first name. 
In her eyes you see a pool of emptiness colored with regret 
In your mind you envision your child taking its first breath. 
They're swollen and red, evidence of how much she've wept 
You see tiny feet taking their first steps. 
Her words spins your mind into a web of torment 

And into the sea of loss my heart instantly went. 
As I try to unmemorize the date 
And not count the coming years as mised birthdays. 
I try to erase from memory the very knowledge of knowing 
And steel the emotions that are violently growing. 
What else can I do but sit still - stunned 
Willing my body to accept whats already been done. 
Trying not to think about the word 'father' 
Refusing to believe that I've just lost a son or maybe a daughter. 
I've been robbed...cheated...now what's an Almost Father to do? 
Women, do you think abortion affects only you? 

N.C.D. Lewis
2005/2006